Well, I've been asked to send out another mulu. People were saying that
I'm slacking off. So, I decided to write a story at random for all of
you. You will be the first to read it, like a premier of one of my
stories. Some day I will print it out and turn it into a hard copy.
Hmm... Title, eh? How about....
Jumpin' Cataracts! My Toe Nails Are Gone!!!
I was walking down the street one day when suddenly I thought to my
self, "I wonder how much money I have." This thought was abolished by a
microwaveable Criminal. After about 6 minutes and flipping over half way
he began steeling my money. I ran away afterwords shouting, "What the
Belk!"
5 days later I relized that I was in a coma. After another month I came
out of it and decided to start my own ammusement park. It would be called
The place that takes your toe nails.
I found a piece of land that no one owned in Washington DC. It had a big
building on it that was white and some guy calling himself the President
was telling me to stop pushing him off his land. Well, I had the building
demolished and the guy ended up on the streets somewhere. In the place of
the building I erected a giant tower of myself. Around I constructed
rides that were all the same but with different names. Actually, all the
rides were different and the names were the same. They were all called
Mike's Terror Ride of Flames! There was the Mike's Terror Ride of Flames
tea cup ride, Mike's Terror Ride of Flames roller coaster, Mike's Terror
Ride of Flames petting zoo, and a Mike's Terror Ride of Flames seat that
sits in front of scary stuff while fire is ignited behind you, sort of
like a ride with flames and pretty terrorfying.
On Friday the Park opened. No one came.
On Saturday I kidnapped one million people for no reason. Everyone was
amazed that, also, one million people decided to visit the park that day.
Some question why they were chained and had gag clothes in their mouth,
but I just told them, "That's half the fun here, the other half is the
swiss cheese."
On Sunday I recieved over 700 billion dollars in ransom and the Park
seemed to have become very popular. By popular I mean that some men
called the Secret Service came and shot me in the Toe. I then stole their
toe nails and said, "Gwaarg!" I then became the Dictator of the World for
no reason. As dictator I reinstated my theme park. Everyone was required
to go on it at least twice a year, 700 times if you lived in D.C. Still,
nobody went, so I executed everyone, except that one person, you know,
that one. That person went on to read this story, so I guess that one
person is you. There fore, everyone else around you is a ghost was
executed a couple days ago. Run! Run now before it's too late. They're
comeing to kill you from beyond the grave. Ahhhhh!